I explained my dilemma to the other two people in my ‘troika’ group, and then turned my back. For the next few minutes, they discussed the problem as if I wasn’t there. I heard empathy, I heard honesty. They were free to talk to each other about what I’d said without worrying about me becoming defensive, or correcting them. They also said what they’d intuited about what I’d not said. It was liberating for us all.